RyansWorld: Geezertronics

'''Special Note: Please note that this scenario is meant to be read as entertainment, not as an accurate prediction of the future. Also note that the viewpoints and opinions that may come across in this scenario are not necessarily the viewpoints and opinions of the author.'''

Geezertronics will be future neologism for electronics intended for people who are over 50 years of age. People born before 1975 will become the first generation to really appreciate the use of "Geezertronics" in their lives.

Summary


These things will include computers, Blu-Ray devices, portable mace spray for would-be elder abusers that notify the nearest police after being used, and even cancer detection devices. They will operate on the CheapNet (what dial-up Internet access will be called by the year 2025) although an option to make them broadband capable will cost more than the actual product themselves. Geezertronic equipment will be made and assembled in the U.S.A. by domestic (American) manufacturers and electronic companies. Most older people today still mistrust things made from Asian countries such as Japan, China, Hong Kong, and Taiwan.

Other Geezertronic equipment include an iPod that only plays country music and devices that allows people to make their own adult diapers out of recycled newspaper. Instruments will emerge so that people can "speak" into blogs, e-mails and replying to an Internet forum. This speech, will of course, by converted into text format. Recognizing 100 languages from African to Zulu (and everything in between), it can tell the difference between US English, Canadian English and UK English within 0.2 seconds.

Robot companions
Geezertronics even has a division devote to making robot wives, robot husbands, robot butlers, robot maids, robot cooks, and even robot housekeepers so the geezers don't have to go the nursing home. Robot wives will prefer white high-waisted granny panties while robot husbands will prefer white vintage Fruit of the Loom briefs, circa 1992. Robot maids, cooks and housekeepers are programmed to dress in the latest fashions when not working and are generally free of the restrictions that are hardcoded into the robot husbands and wives. Sexual functions on a robot husband or wife are comprehensive; with options available from assisted masturbation to a complete act of sexual intercourse (penis inside vagina). Robot children and grandchildren can be purchased for a premium by childless seniors who need extra companionship. Each robot husband is given several outfits including a white tie outfit, a business suit and several casual outfits. Robot wives are given a nightgown along with several dresses, casual clothes and earrings.



Websites such as Twitter and eBay will be considered old people websites, while the younger crowds will watch YouTube and other innovative sites. Sincoe there will be more senior citizens than young people by the year 2050, fashion innovation will stagnate while technological advances will keep coming at a faster pace.

In the case of a military emergence, the robots husbands and wives can be called to active duty in the military in a consulant role to the combat robots. Humans are prohibited from being employed in the military and/or use lethal weapons thanks to the Military Peace Charter of 2037. Any unemployment caused by the peace charter will be offset by the creation of jobs not involving war or nation-sanctioned violence. Hydrogen-powered driverless vehicles can be "driven" by any of the robot companions from the inside of the vehicle if the person doesn't feel confident with Google's AI driving the vehicle. Refuelling stations are always located within 15 minutes of each other and offer various services like fast food restaurants, inexpensive groceries, garage service and arcade-style video games.

Robot husbands and wives can be trained to follow certain sports like baseball, gridiron football, association football, ice hockey, basketball, cricket, professional wrestling and even ballet. Three different personality chips are available for the English language: North American, Western European and Australian.